One secret to a great marriage

I found out recently that a young married couple that I am friends with have a secret. It’s a deep dark secret that they don’t just share with anyone. But they let me in on it, and now I am going to tell you:

They use secret hand signals.

Oh yeah. Hand signals. All I could think of was, in 18 years of marriage why had I not thought of this?

For instance, when they are talking socially in a group, and one of them needs to break away from an awkward conversation, they have a signal for that. If it’s late, and it’s time to go home but they don’t want to be rude, they have a signal for that.

Now that I have broken into their little code, of course, they can no longer use these signals on me. I can go on being as awkward as I want to be, and I will remain…inescapable.

But I digress.

I wondered what hand signals I could begin to implement in my marriage? I could certainly use one for talking about stuff around my 3 children. Spelling words out no longer works when all of your kids can read. “Hey honey, do you think we should go to H-e-r-s-h-e-y Park this weekend?” I mean, even my 6 year figured that one out.

Or maybe I could use a secret hand signal at church? Like if the sermon is going too long, or if someone is telling me about their foot problem. This could be very useful. I would signal for my wife, and she would come rescue me from being perceived as rude.

And then there is the matter of what these secret signs should look like. I, for one, would like to use big swooping gestures. Like flapping my arms like a bird or jumping up and down on one leg. Probably I would like to add sound effects as well.

Subtle, I know.

What do you think? What would be the most useful time to have a secret hand signal?