PORN: no big deal?

“If you sent a bottle of vodka to every home in America every week for a year, you would no doubt have a whole wave of alcoholics. The internet has created a wave of pornography addicts with its pervasive porn delivery mechanisms.” (Craig Gross, founder of xxxchurch.com)

For me it would be nacho cheese Doritos, but whatever.

A “wave of porn addicts” coming your way! But here’s the rub. Many of our most amplified cultural voices send a clear message that pornography is no big deal. Today it seems kind of innocent to remember when Seinfeld opened up a can of worms talking about the “M” word and being the “master of one’s domain.” But I have since seen sitcoms that laugh openly about porn, writing it off as ordinary and commonplace; it’s what every guy does. And according to Oprah, it’s what a growing number of women also do.

According to our culture, porn doesn’t hurt anybody. It’s a victimless crime. In fact, it’s a victimless non-crime.

But is that true? Here are some of my quick-thoughts on why you should avoid pornography:

1. You can never get enough to satisfy.Porn is something that people often look at in order to forget about their real life issues. You have a bad day, you feel disrespected by your boss, or you’re just fatigued—look at some porn. Experts tell us that porn starts with milder forms, but quickly leads to the more deviant. The titillation factor is no longer enough to arouse. Because of this sliding board effect, some people may eventually begin to act out on their fantasies by visiting strip clubs, prostitutes, or other sexual encounters.
2. It affects your real life relationships.Listen to what singer John Mayer said in an interview last year: “Internet pornography has absolutely changed my generation’s expectations. How could you be constantly synthesizing an orgasm based on dozens of shots? You’re looking for the one photo out of 100 you swear is going to be the one you finish to, and you still don’t finish. Twenty seconds ago you thought that photo was the hottest thing you ever saw, but you throw it back and continue your shot hunt and continue to make yourself late for work. How does that not affect the psychology of having a relationship with somebody? It’s got to.” Porn turns a human into an object of lust. It dehumanizes. It puts selfish desire in the front and other’s needs in the back.
3. You could lose your job.1/5 of employees look at porn at work. I personally know of people who have lost their livelihood because of porn. The addiction became too much for them to reserve for home, they were caught at work, and they were fired.
4. Porn leads to divorce.½ of all divorces site porn as a contributing factor. It breaks down trust, love, and healthy sexuality.
5. Jesus doesn’t like it.Jesus’ words on this issue are really clear. He simply says that “anyone who even looks at a woman [or man] with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Mt. 5:28). Tough words to live by, to be sure. But he gave these words to us as a blessing, not a curse.

If you are having a problem with porn, there are many good ways to get help. Talk to a trustworthy friend or pastor, get counseling, find a support group (like “Band of Brothers” at LWCC), get an internet filter, and check out xxxchurch.com for more resources.